Lynne
Level 1
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I have seen a number of people here in community discussion talking about success and frustration at not reaching certain goals.
I just wanted to share some personal things that I have been through that might help with perspective.
8 years ago I was sitting in a crack house, high as can be, surrounding by shady characters. At 1.68m tall I weighed about 50kgs. I had a broken nose and 2 black eyes, with bruises all over my body, compliments from the one I loved at the time.
I believed that the end was near. I couldn't get off drugs, I couldn't get my life straight. I couldn't get the man I loved to stop abusing me.
I felt like I was not enough. Not enough of anything.
Think of the lowest thing you think a person could do to get hold of drugs? Well I've probably done it.
I have been at death's door and I have been in hell.
On the 2nd August I will be 8 years clean. It has not been an easy journey for me in any way. I have had to work through horrible memories, through things that have been done to me and things that I have done to other people.
Then when I was 2 years clean I fell pregnant with my long distance boyfriend in a very new relationship (3 months) and I cried buckets. I felt like my world was only just starting to come right and now I am in trouble again.
I thought my new boyfriend would treat me like the rubbish I truly believed I was, cast me aside and leave me to fend for myself and a baby on my own. I felt like I couldn't even look after myself yet, how would I cope?
I called my best friend and before I could tell her my news she told me she had cancer of the colon and she was going into hospital NOW to have her colon removed.
That kinda puts things in perspective doesn't it?
My biggest problem was that the miracle of life was given to me, yes a little unexpectedly sure, but it was still a miracle wasn't it? And my closest friend has been told that they are going to try and remove her colon successfully and hope that the cancer has not spread. She was 34 at the time.
By the time my daughter was born I was married to the father, my best friend had her operation successfully, been told it had spread to lymph cancer and had months and months of gruelling chemotherapy and then given the all clear.
I am now today on the verge of being 8 years clean from drugs and alcohol. I am 9 months free from smoking cigarettes. I am a mom of 2 absolutely amazing children. I have a husband that loves me dearly and has never shouted at me once. He looks after me in all ways, well except doing the dishes and cleaning... we fight over that... but that's ok.
I have my own business. I work at home online in the mornings and then I fetch my kids at lunch time, we come home and eat, play and watch tv. My husband comes home every night straight after work because he wants to, he is a family man.
We are happy, we are financially independent and we have love.
Do you think this came easily? NO. I have worked my ass off every single day to achieve what I have now.
So don't look at other people and think they found success easily, or that they are "lucky".
One of the most important things I have learned over the years is to stop with the "I'll be happy when...." mentality. As soon as you have that, you set another goal and you will only be happy when you achieve that goal.
If you are unhappy today, sit down, write a gratitude list and realize what you DO have right now and remember to be grateful and happy.
Yes work towards your goals of course, but please be happy and grateful every day for what you have.
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Such an interesting story. But i am very glad to read that you overcome all these bad things and hard time. I guess that most of us getting hard times and good times unexpectedly, even when you list think of it. I call it destiny, and it is. I was also going trough some very hard time in my life, few times, when here was a war in my country and i unexpectedly find my self as refugee about 20.000 miles away from my home... It would be too big and too sad story to talk about now, but, thanks God i overcome all bad times, i was good fighter and now i feel like a winner, which is really rewarding and happy feeling :)
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It changes everything, I promise you that.
Thank you and I hope you are writing your gratitude list :) It changes everything, I promise you that.
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| Match | Count | SQL | Script |
| SELECT * FROM members_ledger WHERE ip = ? AND added>=unix_timestamp(NOW())-86400 | 1 | SELECT querystring, added
FROM members_ledger
WHERE
ip = ? AND added>=unix_timestamp(NOW())-86400 | /opt/clerks-staging/docroot/include/functions/includes/security.php 398 fetchMemberLedger() include_once() |
| SELECT * FROM `questions` as q JOIN categories_faq as c ON q.catid=c.CATID WHERE (q.status=1 OR (q.status=2 AND userid='') ) AND q.quesid='18231' | 1 | SELECT q.*, c.seo as CatSEO, c.name as CatName, c.parentid
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| SELECT * FROM seoclerks.members WHERE USERID='306632' | 1 | SELECT * FROM seoclerks.members WHERE USERID='306632' | /opt/clerks-staging/docroot/include/functions/includes/member.php 445 GetAllUserDetails() () |
| SELECT * FROM categories_faq WHERE CATID='55' | 1 | SELECT CATID, seo, name, metatitle, h2header, metakeywords, metadescription, metaheader, parentid, image_name FROM categories_faq WHERE CATID='55' | /opt/clerks-staging/docroot/libraries/adodb5/adodb.inc.php 1899 CacheExecute() GetCategorySeoFromType() |
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| SELECT * FROM ratings_faq as r, seoclerks.members as m WHERE r.USERID=m.USERID AND r.upvote=1 AND r.PID=18231 LIMIT 5 | 1 | SELECT m.username FROM
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| SELECT * FROM ratings_faqanswers as r, seoclerks.members as m WHERE r.USERID=m.USERID AND r.upvote=1 AND r.PID=119755 LIMIT 5 | 1 | SELECT m.username FROM
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| SELECT * FROM ratings_faqanswers as r, seoclerks.members as m WHERE r.USERID=m.USERID AND r.upvote=1 AND r.PID=130210 LIMIT 5 | 1 | SELECT m.username FROM
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LIMIT 5 | /opt/clerks-staging/docroot/include/functions/main.php 17159 GetVoters() () |
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| SELECT * FROM ratings_faqanswers as r, seoclerks.members as m WHERE r.USERID=m.USERID AND r.upvote=1 AND r.PID=117766 LIMIT 5 | 1 | SELECT m.username FROM
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| SELECT * FROM ratings_faqanswers as r, seoclerks.members as m WHERE r.USERID=m.USERID AND r.upvote=1 AND r.PID=119346 LIMIT 5 | 1 | SELECT m.username FROM
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| SELECT * FROM ratings_faqanswers as r, seoclerks.members as m WHERE r.USERID=m.USERID AND r.upvote=1 AND r.PID=134949 LIMIT 5 | 1 | SELECT m.username FROM
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LIMIT 5 | /opt/clerks-staging/docroot/include/functions/main.php 17159 GetVoters() () |
| SELECT * FROM ratings_faqanswers as r, seoclerks.members as m WHERE r.USERID=m.USERID AND r.upvote=1 AND r.PID=163702 LIMIT 5 | 1 | SELECT m.username FROM
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LIMIT 5 | /opt/clerks-staging/docroot/include/functions/main.php 17159 GetVoters() () |
| UPDATE questions SET total_views = total_views + 1 WHERE quesid='18231' | 1 | UPDATE questions SET total_views = total_views + 1 WHERE quesid='18231' | /opt/clerks-staging/docroot/include/functions/main.php 1765 update_Faqviewcount() () |
| SELECT * FROM questions WHERE quesid!='18231' AND status='1' AND (question like '%Gratitude Check: happy WHEN...%' OR question like '%Gratitude%' OR question like '%Check:%' OR question like '%happy%' OR question like '%WHEN...%') -- ORDER BY RAND() LIMIT 15 | 1 | SELECT quesid, question, seo, userid
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LIMIT 15 | /opt/clerks-staging/docroot/libraries/adodb5/adodb.inc.php 1899 CacheExecute() () |
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| SELECT * FROM seoclerks.members WHERE USERID='1856' limit 1 | 1 | SELECT profilepicture FROM seoclerks.members WHERE USERID='1856' limit 1 | /opt/clerks-staging/docroot/libraries/adodb5/adodb.inc.php 1899 CacheExecute() insert_get_member_profilepicture() |
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| SELECT * FROM members_ledger WHERE script='/opt/clerks-staging/docroot/viewfaq.php' AND querystring LIKE '%id=18231%' AND added>=UNIX_TIMESTAMP(NOW())-1200 GROUP BY USERID | 1 | SELECT USERID, username FROM members_ledger
WHERE script='/opt/clerks-staging/docroot/viewfaq.php'
AND querystring LIKE '%id=18231%'
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GROUP BY USERID
| /opt/clerks-staging/docroot/libraries/adodb5/adodb.inc.php 1899 CacheExecute() () |
| SELECT * FROM categories | 1 | SELECT * FROM categories | /opt/clerks-staging/docroot/libraries/adodb5/adodb.inc.php 1899 CacheExecute() parseRedundantQueriesCache() |
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| select * from categories_wanttobuy order by name asc | 1 | select * from categories_wanttobuy order by name asc | /opt/clerks-staging/docroot/libraries/adodb5/adodb.inc.php 1899 CacheExecute() insert_get_wantcategories() |
| select * from categories_wanttotrade order by name asc | 1 | select * from categories_wanttotrade order by name asc | /opt/clerks-staging/docroot/libraries/adodb5/adodb.inc.php 1899 CacheExecute() insert_get_tradecategories() |
| SELECT * FROM seoclerks.members WHERE USERID='272.jpg' | 1 | SELECT profilepicture FROM seoclerks.members WHERE USERID='272.jpg' | /opt/clerks-staging/docroot/libraries/adodb5/adodb.inc.php 1899 CacheExecute() getUserProfileImage() |
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| SELECT * FROM seoclerks.members WHERE USERID='212316.jpg' | 1 | SELECT profilepicture FROM seoclerks.members WHERE USERID='212316.jpg' | /opt/clerks-staging/docroot/libraries/adodb5/adodb.inc.php 1899 CacheExecute() getUserProfileImage() |
| SELECT * FROM seoclerks.members WHERE USERID='139192.png' | 1 | SELECT profilepicture FROM seoclerks.members WHERE USERID='139192.png' | /opt/clerks-staging/docroot/libraries/adodb5/adodb.inc.php 1899 CacheExecute() getUserProfileImage() |
| SELECT * FROM seoclerks.members WHERE USERID='254580.jpg' | 1 | SELECT profilepicture FROM seoclerks.members WHERE USERID='254580.jpg' | /opt/clerks-staging/docroot/libraries/adodb5/adodb.inc.php 1899 CacheExecute() getUserProfileImage() |
| SELECT * FROM seoclerks.members WHERE USERID='601667.jpg' | 1 | SELECT profilepicture FROM seoclerks.members WHERE USERID='601667.jpg' | /opt/clerks-staging/docroot/libraries/adodb5/adodb.inc.php 1899 CacheExecute() getUserProfileImage() |
| SELECT * FROM seoclerks.members WHERE USERID='597034.png' | 1 | SELECT profilepicture FROM seoclerks.members WHERE USERID='597034.png' | /opt/clerks-staging/docroot/libraries/adodb5/adodb.inc.php 1899 CacheExecute() getUserProfileImage() |
| SELECT * FROM seoclerks.members WHERE USERID='591586.jpg' | 1 | SELECT profilepicture FROM seoclerks.members WHERE USERID='591586.jpg' | /opt/clerks-staging/docroot/libraries/adodb5/adodb.inc.php 1899 CacheExecute() getUserProfileImage() |
| SELECT * FROM seoclerks.members WHERE USERID='589808.jpg' | 1 | SELECT profilepicture FROM seoclerks.members WHERE USERID='589808.jpg' | /opt/clerks-staging/docroot/libraries/adodb5/adodb.inc.php 1899 CacheExecute() getUserProfileImage() |
| SELECT * FROM seoclerks.members WHERE USERID='589438.jpg' | 1 | SELECT profilepicture FROM seoclerks.members WHERE USERID='589438.jpg' | /opt/clerks-staging/docroot/libraries/adodb5/adodb.inc.php 1899 CacheExecute() getUserProfileImage() |
| SELECT * FROM seoclerks.members WHERE USERID='725710.jpg' | 1 | SELECT profilepicture FROM seoclerks.members WHERE USERID='725710.jpg' | /opt/clerks-staging/docroot/libraries/adodb5/adodb.inc.php 1899 CacheExecute() getUserProfileImage() |
| select * from categories_faq order by name asc | 1 | select * from categories_faq order by name asc | /opt/clerks-staging/docroot/libraries/adodb5/adodb.inc.php 1899 CacheExecute() insert_GetFaqCategories() |
| count(*) | sql1 | error_msg |
|---|
| Load | Count | SQL | Max | Min |
| Avg Time | Count | SQL | Max | Min |
| 0.179534 | 1 | SELECT COUNT(A.wantid) AS total FROM wanttobuy as A, categories_wanttobuy B, seoclerks.members C WHERE A.active = 1 AND A.category = B.CATID AND A.USERID = C.USERID | 0.179534 | 0.179534 |
idealmike
There's something I have got to say and get off my chest, out of my mind and down on paper.
Sometimes in life, it's easy to take what we have for granted. To get complacent.
But in life, you should never take anything for granted. Not even the air you breath.
You know what, we're more than fortunate people.
Do you have a home with a warm bed and a roof over your head?
Do you have a fridge/cupboard with lots of nice food in it?
Do you have a loving wife/husband and kids growing up or already left the nest?
Do you have a job, an income, stability and security?
If you do, please recognize how fortunate you are and give thanks for this.
If you do, you're one of the fortunate people on Earth.
If you do, give thanks for everything you have.
When you wake up in the morning. Give thanks for that.
When you go outside and inhale a huge fresh breath of air. Give thanks for that.
When you can hear the birds chirping away. Give thanks for that.
When you look up and see the blue sky and clouds rolling by. Give thanks for that.
When you boil the kettle and make yourself a coffee. Give thanks for that.
When you get a new client and sale, give thanks for that.
When you laugh, smile or just feel fine. Give thanks for that.
In fact, give thanks for everything you have in your life and even your life itself.
If you have 2 legs, 2 arms, 2 hands and all your fingers.
If you have 2 eyes, 2 ears and are healthy and fit.
Give thanks for that.
Whether it's giving thanks to God or just saying thanks to the universe.
Because we live in a very unjust and unfair world.
A world where Karma doesn't actually exist.
A world where one side has it good and the other has it worse than bad.
A world that isn't always butterflies and rainbows.
A world that offers glittering prizes to those with stout hearts and sharp swords.
A world that values you by how big your bank balance is, or how big your house is or by what car you drive.
A world that even though it has the power and resources to completely eradicate poverty, it doesn't.
A world where the rich will always continue to get richer and the poor will get poorer.
A class separated world where those with the most money have the most class and get the most respect.
A world that doesn't treat everyone as equal even though we all are.
I guess I'm having a big of a dig at the world. But it's not all bad.
Despite all these things, it's still worth living and giving thanks for.
Yes it's a crazy world we live in where some things can't be made any sense of.
We're living in very uncertain times where the whole world stands on a razers edge.
But there are still genuinely good things and genuinely good people in the world.
There are still things that make life worth living.
It's still possible to laugh and have fun.
It's still possible to feel good about the world.
It's still possible to have a sense of humor.
And it's always possible to give thanks!
And by doing so, you'll learn to be happy with what you have.
And not what the world says you should have or what you think you need, to be happy!
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